Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Rock Bottom Expectations = Free Beer For Life. Perhaps.

Last week I hipped you to the less than overwhelming support and confidence that Austrian fans had in their national team going into Euro2008. And despite playing well in their first match, it seems the hope at this point is not for a single win, or even a single draw, but perhaps just for a single goal {actually a draw against Poland is possible after watching both teams opening matches} to avoid the goalless 3 loss trifecta.

As such, Austrian brewery Ottakringer Brauerei AG has offered free beer for life to any player on the Austrian national team to score a goal in their remaining two matches. Not a game winning goal. Not the first goal. Any goal, in either game.

Good free marketing plan by the brewery for certain.

So watch out Poland and Germany: if Austria romp 4-0 in these two matches, then clearly they are not Pavlov's Dogs, but Pavlov's Drunks.


Vastic FTW FTB!

Losing 0-1 to Poland, Austria were awarded a penalty in the 92nd minute. Up stepped 38 year old captain Ivica Vastic and he buried it: free beer for life, and a lifeline for Austria, who live to fight another day, specifically Tuesday against Germany.


beast in 'bama said...

First, assume the scorer of this golden goal is named Hans.

Now go forward with me to the year 2023, in a popular beer garden in the heart of Vienna, as a paunchy Hans enters the establishment...


"Guten Tag, jeder."
(Translation: Good afternoon, everybody.)

"Wie geht es, Hans?"
(How's it going, Hans?)

"Es ist ein Hund essen Hund-Welt, und ich trage Milchknochen-Unterkleidung."
(It's a dog eat dog world, and I'm wearing milk bone underwear.)

beast in 'bama said...


What's shaking Ivica?"
"All four cheeks & a couple of chins."

"What's new Ivica?"
"Terrorists. They've taken over my stomach & they're demanding beer."

Kanu said...

Again, here's hoping it's proper beer and not the Budweiser of Austria.

Considering is fucking AUSTRIA, chances are that dude is all set.