Back Then Hoes Didn't Want Me, Now I'm Hot Hoes All On Me

At every World Cup there are players who really impress that were formerly not very well known. Soon thereafter many of these players are bought up by the big European clubs at inflated prices, and those clubs expect the players to replicate their great World Cup form for them. This is a bit silly, since playing for club and country can be very different based on style, tactics, formation, etc. Sometimes this works out for the club, while other times they find out that they have wasted a bunch of money (Liverpool's purchase of Senegal's Diouf & Diop just after WC2002 comes to mind).

Anyhow, here is a quartet of players who have stood out to me as the Mike Joneses of this World Cup, as in:


"Back then hos didn't want me,
Now I'm hot hos all on me"

1. Frank Ribery, France. Scarface Tom Green is Les Bleus youngest player at 23; his first appearance for the national team was just this May in a pre-WC friendly with Mexico. He has rewarded Domenech's somewhat controversial selection of him over Ludovic Giuly, Robert Pires, and even Nicolas Anelka with outstanding play overall. Last year he moved from Metz to Marseille after a loan spell at Galatasary; I'll be very suprised if he is still at Marseille at the beginning of the club season in 6 weeks.


"I remember back then, most of them hoes couldn't stand me,
but now them same hoes begging me to pull down they panties."

2. Eric Abidal, France. This 26 year old left back has really impressed for France. He reminds me alot of Arsenal(for now)/England left back Ashley Cole: good on the ball, very quick, excellent going forward, and a good crosser. His ball skills are so good for a defender that I wonder if like Ash he started out his career as a striker. After 3 years at Monaco, 3 years at Lille, and 3 years at Lyon, he will be on the shortlist of any major club looking for a left back. I'm sure he is on Arsene Wenger's radar. If Chel$ea are really going to pay 20 million pounds for Ashley Cole, then why not sell him and buy Abidal from Lyon for 10 million? He's not quite Ashley but he's a pretty damn good replacement with a similar style. Although Wenger is on record as saying it is much smarter to buy players before major competitions not after (see: Thomas Rosicky), he did buy Sylvain Wiltord after Euro 2000, so anything is possible.


"Before the ice was in my grill, before I got my major deal,
these hoes wouldn't give a damn if I here. Sheea!"

3. David Odonkor, Germany. The German super sub, who reminded me of a soccer version of Vinnie "The Microwave" Johnson off the bench for the 1980s Detroit Pistons, changed every match that he entered with his dangerous pace, unbridled energy, and skill on the wing. I don't watch much Bundesliga during the year, so I cannot comment on whether his play for Borussia Dortmund, as a starter, is significantly different. Reminds me of Arsenal's Freddy Ljungburg or Barcelona's Ludovic Giuly with his pace and work rate - always running his socks off. Only 22 years old, I wouldn't be suprised if he is snatched up by another club in the next year, especially Bayern Munich, who always seem to snatch up the best young talent from all of the other clubs in Germany.


"They used to love to diss me,
now they rush to hug & kiss me,
now they telling all they friends,
when I leave how they miss me."

4. Miguel, Portugal. Portugal's right back has really impressed at this tournament, and is one of the few players on his team who managed not to resort to diving and whining during their run to the semifinals. Rock solid in the back, good on the ball, and get go forward and get into dangerous positions. Last year he moved to Valencia after 5 years at Benfica, so he is now at a larger medium sized club, but will be high in the minds of the bigger clubs who might be looking for a new right back.


"Two eight one, three three oh, eight zero zero four,
hit Mike Jones Miguel up on the low,
cause Mike Jones Miguel about to blow."

These are the 4 that stick out most in my mind. Other nominations for the "Mike Jones! XI" may be submitted in the comments section.