Wednesday, May 2, 2007

Arsenal Joga Bonito Wednesday:
God Save The Queen Edition

AJBW has been on hiatus for a while, partly because I have been mad busy and partly because Arsenal were pretty damn rubbish there for a while. The last few games they have been playing some really joga bonito, especially in the first halves of games.

But fuck all that, today is all about Her Majesty The Queen Gooner.

EIIR: "I'm Arsenal till I die."

You see, it recently was revealed that England's 2nd longest reigning monarch is an Arsenal supporter and has been a Gooner for 50 years. This had been a tight-lipped secret for some reason, probably some crap about it not being Royal to show favoritism or whatnot, and most amazingly she was outed by a 19 year old Spanish kid named Cesc Fabregas.

It was long known that The Queen Mother was a Gooner, and soon to be off to Iraq Prince Harry is a well known Arsenal supporter as well.

"I don't give a toss about this ceremony- what's the Arsenal score?"

I just love that there is now something that I share in common with the Queen Of England, and that is that we get euphorically high when The Arsenal wins big matches, but even cooler that we both have our days darkened and are reduced to uttering profanities when big games go in the favour of our opponents. I envision Queen Elizabeth raising both fists in the air and screaming out "FUCK YESSSSSS!" when Patrick Vieira won the 2005 FA Cup final over Manchester United with the final penalty of the shootout as well as his last kick of his Arsenal career, at the very same moment that I shouted the same thing in the middle of The Mad Dog In The Fog pub on Haight St, right before I took off my PV4 jersey and held it aloft to taunt all of the ManUtd fans in the house. Similarly, I can imagine her reaction to Ryan Giggs' wondergoal to win that infamous FA Cup Semifinal Replay in 1999 or Belletti's winner through the legs of hapless backup keepr Manuel Almunia with only 7 miuntes left that lost last year Champions League final to Barcelona: and that would probably be to scream out "FUCK!" and toss some 17th century teacup across the room thereby shattering it, and then ordering some servant to clean every single on of her jewels one at a time with a Q-Tip to help her vent her anger and work through the pain.

Equally great is knowing that any time a TV shows an in-match closeup of Jose Mourinho, Ashley Cole, Big Sam Allardyce, or Robbie Savage, that she mutters Royally to no one in particular: "wanker..."

1 comment:

DC Trojan said...

Her home team is Hanover 96, I don't know what crap this is about her being a Gooner. But at least she's well behaved unlike... the Queen Mother (Nazi sympathiser) and Prince Harry, you don't want fans like that. Delinquents, the lot of them.